Two separate items here.
First, I objected to Marty listing Gabi as someone promoting homosexuality based on the letter posted at http://www.web-ministry.com/sin/. Her letter didn't appear to promot homosexuality to me; it did, however, codemn violence against homosexuals. Considering the violent way Gabi lost her son, and the equivocal evidence posted on the page, I was asking what was the justification for making this sort of accustation against her.
Second - hermaphrodites are an exceptional case that highlight an issue of gender identity. If gender lies in the genetalia, then hermaphrodites cannot even consider sexual activity mentally without committing sin - the same sort of sin Jesus referred to in Matt 5:28. This is because being both male & female physically, to assume either gender role is to commit homosexuality to some degree. If gender identity lies outside the genitalia, then we give some credence to the argument that there are "women born in men's bodies" and vice versa. So tackling this question requires us to confront and define what gender identity is, where it exists.
I agree that two people of the same gender engaging in sexual relations is contrary to Christian teaching. Okay? But I think the issue deserves a full conversation, not just quick "from-the-hip" pronouncements. Gabi was hurt by what she understands as an <i>ad hominem</i> attack on her of the basis that she chose to love her son even though he identified himself as a practicing bisexual.
I think the issues are (1) can we engage in loving relationships with people committing sin (I hope so!) and (2) can we discuss issues of theological importance without attacking the character of those injured by the actions of others.